Anonymous asked: I am sincerely in love with someone. I got rejected when I tried. She's been my best friend for a year now. She even thought I got over her. I feel I should move on, by the heart wants what it wants. How do I get her to say yes?
I’ve seen two different scenarios occur.
1) Bob was head over heels in love with Sally. Sally led on Bob a lot because she enjoyed the attention, but every time Bob asked her out, she would say no. Bob was always heartbroken and crushed and dramatic every time she said no. Sally wasn’t even the nicest person. She was actually pretty rude. Bob liked her because he thought she liked him.
2) Tim was in love with Sarah. They would always hang out, but when Tim expressed his feelings for her, she told him politely that she thought of him as a friend. They continued to hang out as friends until one day Tim tried once more. Sarah had developed feelings for him, and they’ve been dating for over a year.
So which scenario is closest to your situation? Take off the rose-colored glasses, and try to see her as objectively as possible. If you didn’t have feelings for her, would you consider her an appropriate person to set your affections on? Is she leading you on? Does she enjoy attention from guys?
Or is she really sweet? Do people believe that she is a kind, genuine person? Do you hang out like friends? Does she not lead you on, and you still have feelings for her?
Make sure you are completely positive that this is the girl for you before you pursue a relationship.
If you believe that you truly love her for who she is, then go for it! But by go for it, I mean ease into it. Flirt with her subtly and treat her well (but not in a servant-manner). Don’t be whipped. Respect her. Give her space, but hang out with her often. Don’t force anything.
Once you get any signal from her (ex: leaving her hand out for you to hold, playfully touching your arm, flirting back, etc.) then let her know how you feel.
If she never sends you these signals, then you need to wait for that girl who wants to send you those signals. Don’t try to force someone to like you. If it’s meant to be, it will happen. You won’t be happy if you continue to like her when she does not like you, but you have the potential for happiness by looking elsewhere!
I hope that everything works out for you, but no matter what, always choose to be happy!